looks like SOMEONE is gonna get a change of scenery (and laps) for a few days!
SUNDOG SEASON HAS RETURNED!
and of course i had to get this one done. y’all should give thedollardemon your money
woo!!! thedollardemon doin’ it proper.
hell YES my hellzapoppin merch showed up! i don’t know about y’all, but i don’t wanna live in a world without freak shows.
when i commissioned heritageloaf for a drawing of Richard Spencer getting punched in the face i did not expect this MASTERPIECE in return.
my mamma made me some masks ❤️
who wore it better???
it’s totally normal to go skate with a sweet ‘stache
oh HELL YES my commission from thedollardemon came out even better than i planned
proof of life. and lack of a barber.
y’all thought i was kidding
they’re handing it well
good mail day! got my nathanwpylestrangeplanet plush!
this one can sleep in any position. and she does.
someone got to see their small person for the first time in weeks
WE CAN SHARE THE SITTING PLACE PLEASE THANK YOU
having a little fun with Zoom by repurposing old party photos as backgrounds.
did you know you can get a crossbow on Amazon? #themoreyouknow
finally got to frame the prints i got in Cuba last year with james_atomictattoos that they made me pay a tax on inside the airport. i think i’d rather be there right now?
some cool ranch Doritos nachos with bbq pulled pork and lots of cheese because i’m a culinary genius.
double decker dogs
only took me 2 years but i got these framed
thank you past me for getting things like face masks “just because ya might want it later” and holy shit am i a prepper?
HOW ABOUT WE DO PETS NOW?
no one can accuse dominos of not having a sense of humor
I CAN DO A WIGGLE BUT I MAY BE A LITTLE STUCK
homeschool day 1 in the books. math class via Zoom, and some art via found items in the home.
yeah this quarantine isn’t boring at all why do you ask?
shit’s about to get REAL comfortable up in here
and again dominos comes through with the art request. even pizza can social distance!
baking round two: cap’n crunch peanut butter crunch with melted chocolate chips blended in with the mallows because i believe in myself.
so i made rice crispy treats with Froot Loops but they layered a bit flatter than expected so i broke them off like peanut brittle and they are delicious.
she is ever so delightfully dumb
i think SOMEONE wishes that they didn’t keep messing with the cut on their face.
i got hungry. and yes, these are sausage patties that i cooked in a little bit of maple syrup then melted cheddar on both sides of the biscuit because i’m an American hero
SUNDOG OG
it’s called fashion. look it up.
LOVE. ME. NOW.
just some mornin’ scritches with my girl
in uncertain times like these, i’m glad i do dumb shit like buy flamethrowers.
Dolly wanted me to tell you all to have a good morning.
not that it really matters
something something social distancing
oh my what would people do
keeping my distance, socially speaking
I TOTALLY NEED BOTH FOR REASONS
sometimes you gotta get a gator tooth tattoo’d on your middle finger. this was one of those times.
the boy is getting quite good at drawing with his iPad pencil thing.
yeah i don’t have any clue either
GIVE ME MOAR PETS PLEASE
almost 13, already 30.
i’m gonna assume i was answering a question here during #wcmia2020 which was a damn good time with a lot of good questions. thanks again wcmiami for having me!
and here’s kyleives1 makin’ dollars disappear like a magician
just a couple of good ol boys getting ready to ride sideways
i met a dog today
i just can’t with these two
hey nerds! i’ll be speaking at wcmiami this weekend. and by “speaking” i mean “answering whatever people ask” so it may be a good time 😎
welp i’m just gonna go over here and look where my baby boy went.
it’s called self-care. look it up.
this one matters a little more than you’d imagine. this mug belonged to insta_jonny_vegas and perhaps was the only boring thing he owned. nothing about him was ever boring. and this mug will always remind me of that.

spending the last week or so with close friends and old memories was cathartic in ways i wasn’t prepared for. thank you b0ttle_r0cket for letting me keep this.

you will be missed, Jonny Vegas
had a damn nice Hallmark Holiday, since i decided to spend it with my dogs.
i found some old tapes. yes that timestamp is accurate.
it totally worked
Monday’s, right?
as much as he tried to Cool Guy the whole thing, he had a blast at the teenagebottlerocket show. first dive bar punk show in the books!
trying to teach the boy how to properly destroy things. #lifelessons #dadadvice
i’ve never had a dog that loved their people as much as she does.
needed a utility sink for the garage. $40 for the basin at the ReHome store and maybe another $30 in lumber and screws. can’t complain about that at all.
not bad for (almost all) scrap wood and leftover paint.
that was a damn good night. ...
...
📸 digitalcypher
nacho cheese and BBQ chip hot dogs for dinner because we party
wherever we go, if there is a dog, the dog will become his best friend and not leave his side. 
dogs know 💕
and... he likes it! welcome to coffee town, bud!
PAINT ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS
i can play along too
damn it Vegas, you weren’t supposed to leave this quickly  #fuckcancer
that dumb face 💕
no vacation is complete without a proper couch nap.
sometimes before you fly home you get to see old friends and discover you rock the same fantastic hairstyle. this was one of those times.
and here’s the boy pulling a clean line. not bad at all for his first attempt ¯_(ツ)_/¯
acquired a rotary machine and couldn’t think of a better use than to have my son do his first tattoo on me.
is that a snack size Kit Kat on a piece of black pepper bacon? yes. yes it is.
hell yes carnie museum
finally made it down to the carnie museum and i was not disappointed.
starting the year off strong dominos
i woke up to this. apparently they snuggled each other to sleep last night because of the fireworks.
this checks out
i mean, everyone loves fireworks, right?
a gift from pops. if y’all wondered where i got it from.
yes this was a gift for my son and yes i plan on taking it and using it myself when i feel like it because that’s a perk of being a parent.
someone is gonna go to their first real punk show to see one of his favorite bands next year.
someone had a good day
this is amazing
he let me put the hat on him only because he was basically asleep.
this may be the earliest i’ve ever had everything wrapped and whatnot.
my boy is nothing if not festive
finally getting a little return on that investment in the boy.
asked dominos to draw a “ghost giving a high five” and i opened the box and found this.

y’all outdid yourselves this time. someone deserves a raise.
happy whatevermas to me from dasowth.sgh via my credit card.
and the miter saw table is done. i already see 100 different ways i would have done this. but the boy enjoyed helping and even signed his work.
yeah Dolly, get on that bread crust!
a little Sunday skate sesh
a few ornaments to get in the season.
putting the boy to work a little
how about jen.cray getting this fantastic photo of iamrickolus and myself sharing a special moment.
‘tis the season
sometimes, you just gotta put on an inflatable alligator suit and add a little bit of absurdity into the world. 📸 by digitalcypher
needed a table for my miter saw. so i sawed an old door in half, cut and framed up some extra 2x4’s i had, and cut some 1/2” birch plywood to make a smooth top. used some 1/2” planks i had left over to make a smooth level surface for the saw itself.

i’ll probably paint it and get some carriage bolts to mount the saw itself. no goddamn clue what i’m gonna do for legs ¯_(ツ)_/¯
this massive beast of a workbench is coming along, slowly but surely. 
next is the backplate and pegboard, and some other shit.
having the boy chase his Tamiflu with Sprite since he hates the taste and i’m sure this lesson won’t come back to bite me in the ass later.
Saturday feels
decades are weird #2009vs2019
we’ve all grown, haven’t we? #2009vs2019
the boy also acquired a rather sizable gator head. he named it Chad.
just doing my part to make sure the boy has a well rounded post-apocalyptic skillset.
we met some wee little Sphynx kitties today. yes they were as adorable as you’d imagine. no i did not take any home.
the kid is pretty good.
look, i’m sure y’all have some cool friends. but i know none of them have made you anything even *remotely* as cool as this. so i win.
it’s not even picture day. just a field trip.
once again dominos comes through with the artistic flair
...
#dominospizzapics #pizzaboxart
so that happened
she hasn’t left his side since the moment he got home 💕
i cannot thank bluepearlvet enough for taking such good care of my ride-or-die buddy.
this dude goes in for surgery tomorrow. removing a pesky spleen along with some other general old-dog cleanup.
Toby is the most relaxed dog ever.
so i wore a horse mask at #wcus until the strict “no masks” rule was enforced. 
ya know. just horsin’ around.
it’s surprisingly hard to take a decent arch photo but here we are.
this is a picture of the sandwich whyisjake had because i dove into mine too quickly but they were the same sandwich so it basically counts.
holy shit
since the joinzeta boys were in town, a proper sit down dinner was in order. thanks dani_debuto for the delicious meal!
Dolly is the most loving and affectionate pup i’ve ever had. it’s literally non stop.
early morning errands involve a breakfast of donuts on the tailgate of my truck
that’s right. SIGNATURE EDITION, BITCHES!
making progress on my beast of a workbench
this is my sister’s dog Phineas and he is a very good boy.
so we decided the best way to end the week was to burn a goddamn clown.
hey! take a picture with me and my new cop friends!
slightly less shit than before
thank you so much to cathedraloftears for the awesome work on my againstme tattoo
every vacation should include meeting new dogs.
he chose this for his school pictures tomorrow. i cannot even.
you ain’t wrong, sidewalk
go sports team!
Sunday is skate day
the boy wanted black hair. so here we are.
he’s getting better
something something #nationalcoffeeday
goodness they love each other
yeah, we did another round
how do you get a 12 year old to get excited? cheese. the answer is cheese.
don’t be jealous of my birthday charcuterie board
someone grew a plant
i’ve been a fan of badreligionband for about 25 years now. it’s odd to think that nearly every significant life event i’ve had, i’ve listened to their music in the background.
Dolly’s nap game is STRONG
super fucking stoked to have ronaldstrange do my Burt Reynolds memorial piece.
i believe they’ve taken a fancy to each other.
so this happened
this bastard has been leaking for years and finally it’s sealed so goddamn well i can find the other leaks!
this old man has been my loyal sidekick for many years now. he’s a little slower but just as chill as the day he arrived. he’s my Toby. ..
.. #nationaldogday
she’s the dumbest dog i’ve ever had *by far* and i’ve never felt more love from another thing. she’s my little Dolly Tot
..
.. #nationaldogday
i am totally on board with Kayla’s pancake idea
yeah he’s mine
can’t come to a town and NOT visit your favorite 3-legged dog (and rad friends)
unhealthy fair food is my favorite
i haz new front door
thanks honcho_tattoos for banging out this hobo penny!
we had to have a little chat about the difference between confidence and arrogance.
YOU SPEAK TRUTH TO POWER, SON!
who wore it better?
and away we go!!!
i sorta feel like maybe Amazon has figured me out?
so back in Sept 2018, i made a $1 bet with starttodaymotion that i won. he vowed that i would never get that dollar.
..
..
fast forward to August 2019 and low and behold, he leaves this on my fridge. so framing it was the only logical step.
“i need underwear, but DON’T get it for my birthday.” ..
..
i swear, it’s like he’s never met his parents before.
the kid travels like a pro
welcome to age 12. let’s spend half the day on airplanes!
someone turns 12 years old on the 1st
getting in some skate time while on vacation
kazoos and video games. i don’t think he could live a better life if he tried.
the boys are living that kazoo life
i figured the boy couldn’t turn 12 without owning a proper watch.
...
...
...
also i should check the price tags before showing him things.
lets go to California
this little girl is not a fan of the storms
looks like we’ve got ourselves an urban MacGyver over here
it’s nice knowing that this is waiting for me when i get home
so availrichmond played a better set than i could have even dreamed of
i’ve gotta thank digitalcypher for taking what may be the best photograph of my life to date.
sometimes i make good choices. sometimes i make better ones by hanging out with folks like hurr1caneprty and astronautalis
i’m not really sure i understand this face app
this face app is weird
good lord i was a child having a child. ..
..
or as i said to c.monkey823 this morning: think fate said to the universe: “i’ll bet you a dollar i can turn these fuck-ups into decent parents”
is it day labor? is it skateboarding? yes.
got lucky and the gates were open today. a little slice of Havana in Ybor City
he survived a week of skate camp still wanting to skate.
i believe the word you’re looking for is “cubicle”
my computer got a new computer.
skate or die
this is the best one so far. i have to say dominos y’all really went above and beyond. 
#dominospizzapics
looks like good weather for the fireworks i hope don’t get set off
the boy got his first real skateboard that didn’t belong to someone else (me) first.
the boy’s learning how his board is assembled
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY SMOL CHILD
someone has a little project for the next few days
that face
he made a Nyan Cat in minecraft because i don’t know how any of it works
it’s been a year, that’s for damn sure
Hank was a complete and total asshole who hated everyone that didn’t live in the house. i still miss him.
the boy has a golf camp this week and why is he so big i did not sign up for this.
cousins doin’ cousin things
i got the absolute sweetest gift from thedollyandtobyshow because above everything else, i feed them.
PROUD DAD ALERT!!!
.
.
.
always love it when i get to display work from up and coming artists.
.
.
.
‘twas a good Father’s Day indeed
well i’ll be damned if my boy doesn’t have a solid GIF game already.
finally managed to swing down and pick up this awesome piece from codythecobra
this dude makes being a father pretty fucking awesome
i genuinely hope i’m even half the father he was (and still is)

happy father’s day, old man.
and the man short_e_dangerously getting the crowd fired up for #hellzapoppin

and he’s also standing on glass. that’s also a thing.
mornin’ buddy
a little someone wasn’t quite ready to wake up this mornin’
i’ll tell ya what, that thelizardman23 sure did swallow a sword like nobody’s business at the #hellzapoppin show last night.
that one time i was a human table for short_e_dangerously for the #hellzapoppin show
it’s an important point in a child’s life when they receive their first official mug.
two years ago my son gave me this before i left for Paris and you better fucking believe i kept it
finally got this framed.
basically almost everything i love in a single photo
not too bad for WordCamp #WCAVL
that face. i cannot even.
sometimes you need to get a dumb tattoo. this evening was one of those times. thanks again annastabs !!!
HE USED TO BE SO SMOL
they don’t always draw stuff when i ask them to (politely) but it’s rad as hell when they do. 
#dominosdrawing
gee, i wonder if he’s gonna be able to relax this summer...
Cash finally got to meet my folk’s new pup. he was excited.
starting the summer off proper
i mean, c’mon now, JUST LOOK AT THAT HAPPY FACE
this is the face of someone who’s completed 6th grade and is looking at a summer of being happily lazy. (not pictured: a father low-key freaking out over his little boy growing up so goddamn fast)
obligatory last day / first day photos
the face of a boy who’s about to finish 6th grade
apparently this is science
she always gives me the best smiles when i wake her up ❤️
exactly one year ago this scared little pup showed up at my house with about a 30 minute notice.

i didn’t want another dog. but about 10 seconds after looking at that face, i knew she wasn’t leaving.

she’s my little peach.
what a difference a year (and being continuously loved on) can do to a pup.
we made some almost-s’mores on Nilla wafers because that’s how you do it
after a few days in the tranquil mountains, the natural thing to do is go see a good goddamn punk show.
the kid can art good
nailed it
found this on the boy’s tablet while looking for something else and you damn well better believe i saved it for myself.
hey buddy
someone is very happy to see me after a week away.
this one even started to like me
he’s gotta learn
the cats have accepted me
she turned me into a newt!
there’s a lot of nature here.
friends since middle school. apparently i’ve gotten taller.
draw me like one of your french girls
sometimes a boy just wants to nap with his dog
18 years ago today, while wrapping up another camping trip in Gainesville, i kinda sorta blew up my femur. 
2/10 would not recommend. also, my surgery is old enough to vote now.
someone all of a sudden wants to code
i wanted s’mores ¯_(ツ)_/¯
the boy didn’t sleep before his race because he was afraid his newly pierced ears would hurt.

he still won his age group 😎
glad i was able to bring this humidor back for my dad. i think he liked it.
some of the buildings had metal faces on them
i absolutely loved going to see the Callejón de Hamel while i was in Havana.

the massive murals, sculpture from old pianos and car parts, and a place for the community to gather was inspiring to see.
happened to stumble into a boxing gym in Havana and see a few fighters training.
the boy wanted his ears pierced, and couldn’t really think of a reason why not. 
thanks again konigthomasjames for making it seamless.
the classic car culture in Havana is a combination of nostalgia and necessity. many of these cars are modified with whatever parts could be found, but they still take immense pride in their vehicles.
a few statues and monuments walking around Havana
probably my favorite random photo i took while in Havana.
just some of the buildings i saw while walking the streets of Havana.

i cannot wait to go back. 
thanks again to james_atomictattoos for setting everything up.
a few shots of Havana at night
spent a day in Havana hanging out with the goonvibesteam and holy shit was it a damn good time
and a happy #nationalsiblingday to judyinpalmcoast and my brother Matt who i’m pretty sure isn’t on this site
some more awesome Havana street art
a few shots of some rad graffiti and street art in Havana
seemed fitting to get a tattoo while i was in Havana. thanks again to leocanosatattoo for some amazing work!
can’t wait to get into this set when i get home from Havana
i’ve simply never seen anything love anything else as much as this dog loves me.
i’ve owned this mug ever since my grandfather passed and it’s easily one of my most cherished ones.
because i have amazing friends i got me some availrichmond tickets
the boy went and did himself a nature
ummm well fuck looks like i’ll be heading to Richmond in July
last morning in Brooklyn, quite pleased i was able to also finally meet this dick too.
i rather enjoyed having fancy coffee and delicious pizza with aaronjorbin today.
JAWBREAKER
dicks in New York!
fun was had
“do hipster, but make it lethal”
another trip, another fun tattoo. thanks again adamcobra !!
another fantastic #wcmiami in the books. already looking forward to next year.
i done got snapped
just some cool dudes doing some cool dude stuff at wcmiami
we helped get kids out of cages but now i can say i’ve actually met this dick
the boy decided to science up his breakfast
strawberry Dole Whip and some deep fried Moon Pies. can’t be upset about that.
yeah, she’s my girl 🥰
living his *best* life
this happened
thanks to awesome people like helenhousandi i get to expand my garbage raccoon diet internationally!
apparently the boy’s reason for running is “it’s fun” and not the correct reason of “there is something chasing me that i don’t believe i can defeat.”
he is no longer a smol child person.
every morning Dolly reminds me that she very much loves me 💕
yeah, i’m not really sure either.
i make a damn good meatloaf
thanks to a friend, Cash was able to get a personalized signed set list because why not
as per usual, murderbydeath fucking *killed* it
pre-show hangs at blindtigercafe with this dude
this kid
these two were my Valentines and i’ve gotta say it was the best one i’ve had in years.
the boy spent fair day at Universal with his cousins, which i think technically counts.
...
...
...
thanks taracrawford83 for taking him!
and we’re finished.
hi
i made deep fried biscuits & gravy because i love america
throwback to last year when my boy channeled his inner old timey self.
Toby needed a little help getting on the couch so I built him a step with a little help from Cash.
i am a real professional with a real job who does attend and speak at real conferences, i swear.
i’ve spent time with joinzeta and even had them in my home. they’re some of the kindest people i’ve ever met.

so the band and dani_debuto needs some help getting the word out so he can stay. 
so help.
a little throwback to the day Toby (of thedollyandtobyshow fame) came home from humanesocietytampabay 
HE WAS SO HAPPY!
yeah, that’s a gouda stuffed meatloaf and yeah it’s delicious
the boy decided on magenta
so my awesome friend lizzy_hog made this for my little love potato Dolly because she’s the best.
ok why the hell not. 2009 and 2019
the boy learned about the artist and then did this from memory and boy howdy he’s got talent.
see ya in March, Brooklyn. another slightly irresponsible choice to see jawbreakerband play in a city i don’t live in.
top: my 7th grade photo (1994)

bottom: my son’s 6th grade photo (2018)
here we have the boy deciding bacon is a good delivery mechanism for eggs.
boy’s first selfie
forgot i did this and never posted it. seems like my #topnine is a decent cross-section of the absurd shit that happens, pups, my boy, and the annual reminder of my eventual death.

here’s to another spin on this trash planet 🎉
starting the year off by making poor decisions.
so 2018 was sort of garbage but this little tater tot came into my life so i’ll call it a win.
first xmas LEGO set has been completed 🎉
merry holiday to you and yours
someone likes their new camera
i’m festive
good times were had by all
i’m so glad dominos is having some fun this holiday.
this is the ideal body. you may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
i’m an amazing goddamn role model
got the sweaters ready for Cash and myself. it’ll be his first ugly sweater party.
remember that time i had a pet pig? that was fun.
and we’re done. thanks again for another amazing piece nerdneil
sometimes you need a good diner breakfast before school.
missed this dude a lot
i’m sure y’all will have fun at #wcus so just assume i’m there doing something ridiculous.
can’t say enough about how awesome this trip has been and how good it is to have friends who give a shit about the world.
just some more weird shit i found by walking around and getting lost on purpose.
random evening which resulted in a jazz bar. because why not.
before my morning walk. 
funny how being in a walkable city gives me the motivation to... ya know. walk places.
a few shots from the trip up to Mt. Takao this morning. 
holy shit was this amazing.
comin’ down the mountain...
i love getting mail while i’m out of the country.
i was interviewed not 10 mins after i got through customs.

apparently Florida Man is an international sensation.
finally got my tree up
so Dolly had to apologize to joinzeta’s awesome dog Titan because she was rude to him.

she’s learning new social skills.
they knew that one of their persons was not well and they never left his side. they even took shifts.

dogs, y’all.
that’s one flu-ridden child. it’s the opposite of rad.
and now we await the test results. ***UPDATE*** it’s the flu!
are those Krispy Kreme donuts from a waffle iron ala-mode, with both maple AND chocolate syrups?

yes. yes they are.
thanks to another anonymous gift with no note on it.
that’s the face of a boy who made his first ever silent art auction bid. thanks for the great event amigo_tattoo !
circus time
thank you dominos for playing along with my absurd request and drawing a dinosaur.
thanks to whomever purchased this gift for me.
still miss ya every day, gramps. wish you could have seen him grow up a little more.
just a boy and the dog who loves him
just some nerds doin’ nerd shit
someone is a little excited for #wcorlando
mornin’
first thing in the AM he finds the dogs to give them good morning luvins and holy shit how did i end up with such a loving happy kid.
i’m festive
i identify with this mug on a deeply spiritual level.
many years and many tattoos ago, propagandy and i trashed it up BBQ style.

thefestfl is good for bringing back those memories.
since the boy is now all about pins, he can add these gems from thefestfl to his collection
another thefestfl in the books.
someone loves their daddy very very much.
more adventures in tween romance. i appreciate the snack bar taking priority.
and so it begins
waiting for a table and of course he makes dog friends
the last photo before reneelittletattoos made my knee a work of art
so many thanks to reneelittletattoos for the 7 hours of amazing work
if i knew who sent this, i would say thank you. but since it has no name, imma thank Burt Reynolds.
thanks again to codythecobra for this long overdue piece.
someone was quite proud of their bacon cheese dogs.
rise and shine
this mug is very much me
the boy did goat yoga today. he enjoyed himself quite a bit.
it’s #nationalcoffeeday so yeah
this place is pretty legit. thanks again to mordauk and crew for having me!
and here we have tylermaximus making broccoli!
there was both meeting AND greeting. even got a few tips for better sideburns. thanks again luceromusic for a fantastic evening!
and the look of someone who had more fun the night before than they planned for but must learn that you still have to do your responsibility shit 🤣
seeing him so happy made it a good birthday for me.
and then Cash gets to meet brentcowlesmusic and thus i win some major cool dad points
just a couple of cool dudes doing cool dude things.
that time benlucero74 was kind enough to take a picture with my son at his first ever show.
someone got some new shades
here’s to another spin on this trash planet 🎉
can’t mess with my 1985 style
well this is just too cool
Cash has started a pin board. feel free to send pins.
dude decided he wanted purple hair. so he has purple hair.
just doin’ a little mosquito control
got some tucker’d out pups here
the results of joeyneill and myself giving that $3 action figure the business.
man, it’s a SCORCHER out here today!
someone began smiling in their sleep when they got their goodnight pets.
i still can’t believe i am actually allowed to own this.
THIS THING IS RAD
i do believe it’s time to Trogdor the fuck out of some shit.
she persisted.
he’s got a dual system setup at the desk my grandfather built me almost 30 years ago.

he’s my son, no doubt.
RIP to one of the all time best. the man taught me (indirectly) how to talk.
sometimes Dolly gets scared of outside noises and i have to carry this 70lb bucket of love outside to go to the bathroom.
this arrived today and I am SO HERE FOR IT
dog friends are the bestest friends #nationaldogday
this right here is a big fuckin’ lobster.
well isn’t someone hip, slick, and cool.
good times were had by all.
multicultural
so this happened
who wore it better?
and we’re done!
middle school. welp.
decided to treat my self for my birthday. hello meet & greet & private soundcheck!
two birthdays were celebrated. one was 68 years, the other 11. i’ll let y’all figure out which was which.
this was one hell of a fucking gravestone.
hell yeah he got the birthday hat
the descent
so apparently the boy is a natural ¯_(ツ)_/¯
another few shots from the raddest concert venue ever.
this had to be the coolest place I’ll ever see a band play. that it was murderbydeath made it fucking magical.

worth every penny.
so yeah, this was rad.
this was very amazing and very cold
i’m almost upset with the fact he can pull off a fedora without looking like a douchebag.
we’re having a lazy Saturday
someone pretty rad got me a fantastic new desk buddy from 20leagues
someone decided they wanted green hair. so they got green hair.
someone was feeling especially meta this evening.
trash panda vacation is in full effect
woah, we got a daredevil over here
the vacation begins
ROAD TRIP TIME!!!
it was so nice of mrkylemaurer and a.maurer724 to let me get some of that prime babyhead smell.

A++ would sniff again
my dogs don’t hate each other.
someone is quite cool for 7:30am
it was so nice of thedollyandtobyshow to get me this card today.
I’m flanked in life by two pretty cool dudes, I must say.
some Father’s Day diner breakfast with this dude.
just some pups and their small person.
looks like I’ll see ya in Portland come August, jawbreakerband
it’s time for another evening of SnuggleTime with Dolly!
someone managed to get all grown and shit while I wasn’t looking.
thanks to outstandy for the art, and tattoo_russ at outerlimitscostamesa for my new grumpy mug!
they’ve both decided to use pillows 😍
I LIVE IN THE GODDAMN FUTURE
seriously. what even is this.
we’ve begun the great tech hoarding of 2018
this dog is literally hugging me and I cannot even.
i can’t imagine this being comfortable.
it’s dusty in here for some reason
seriously.
he clearly isn’t excited about going to Epcot in the slightest.
Dolly is requesting my undivided attention.
this kid is graduating 5th grade this week and what the hell that can’t be right.
apparently my son is now a robot
rainy Sundays are for nerd projects.
holy shit this face.

holy shit.
Dolly knows she’s home now.
Dolly seems to like Cash.
and... the hair is gone
I GOT A NEW DOG AND HER NAME IS DOLLY AND SHE IS PERFECT
what can I say, my boy is a champ.
and they win the championship!!!
that one is gonna sting a little
more slap singles on top of slap singles
yeah... he’s my son
he hasn’t left my side since I woke up. he missed his person.
someone got a new hat. thanks again bamadesigner !!
and another slap single because he’s got a rhythm
slap singles all day
the scrunchie is BACK
yeah I had a Baby Ruth in Astoria
Goonies Never Say Die
adding to my WordCamp tattoo collection
fun was had
my friends are rad.
only one I could find for #nationalsiblingday

best guess is maybe 1985?
someone likes their new LEGO Batman mug.
just rub some dirt on it
holy shit blast from the past. I had like maybe 5 tattoos at this point.
again with the slap singles 👏
thanks to hellboundj.perry for the piece!!
his hair has reached majestic levels.
and another 2 run slap single. he’s finding his swing.
it’s SportsDad time!
this was a good time.
I needed a nap at #wcmia
Cash making friends at #wcmia
on vacations, I visit other dogs. and ourpitbullolive is one of my favorite vacation dogs ever.
I go to LA and end up hanging out with these bunch of dicks.
it was worth *every penny*
yeah he’s mine
modern bird fashion
DAY 30! DONE! GOODBYE #30daypushupchallenge I HOPE TO NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN EVER.
Florida has a few perks
so day 29 of the #30daypushupchallenge was just a single set of 40 and I cannot figure out what their scaling system is and I hope it’s not just some random number generator fucking with me.
can’t be angry about the slap singles.
I don’t like dealing with other SportsParents but his smile is worth it.
day 28 of this stupid #30daypushupchallenge has 5 sets of 25 and quite honestly that seems a bit excessive and new muscles I didn’t know I had now hurt.
day 27 of the #30daypushupchallenge gave me 4 sets of 25 for another 100 goddamn push-ups and sorry I didn’t notice the shitty camera angle yesterday that one is on me.
caught someone being cool
day 26 of the #30daypushupchallenge has 5 sets of 20 and jesusfuckingchrist I just did 100 push-ups.
day 25 of the #30daypushupchallenge and we’ve got 4 sets of 22 for a total of 88 and I am confident I will never do this again.
day 24 of the #30daypushupchallenge and we’re doing 3 sets of 25 and I’d like to just thank you all for putting up with my bullshit and thankfully there’s only 5 more days of this.
day 23 of the #30daypushupchallenge and apparently yesterday didn’t post but it was 2 sets of 25 and it sucked and today was 2 sets of 28 and it also sucked so you didn’t miss much.
more shots from the first game of the season. Tigers won 15-2!
it’s the first game of the spring SportsDad season!
day 21 of the #30daypushupchallenge had me doing 4 sets of 20 so at least it’s a number divisible by 5? yes I know I’m reaching here but it’s been 21 days of this shit.
thanks again to honcho_tattoos for the killer thigh piece!
day 20 of #30daypushupchallenge had me do 4 sets of 18 because let’s make him count in addition to forcing his body to do unnatural things like exercise.
day 19 of the #30daypushupchallenge had me doing 3 sets of 20 and I just figured out how to add music in iMovie so this may end up being useful other than doing push-ups which I think we can all agree is pretty much bullshit.
these are the only Valentine’s Day cards I will consider as canon.
day 18 of the #30daypushupchallenge was 2 sets of 20 so it was both easier and harder and I’m just glad there’s only 12 more days of this bullshit.
day 17 of the #30daypushupchallenge had me doing 75 goddamn push-ups and at least I’m learning how to use iMovie?
and it’s time for the regional STEM Fair thing
day 16 of the #30daypushupchallenge has me doing another 4 sets of 15 which was incrementally easier than yesterday but I still 100% hate every single moment of this.
the kid wants to learn on his own ¯_(ツ)_/¯
day 15 of the #30daypushupchallenge has me doing 4 sets of 15 and I’m thinking maybe I was a bit ambitious in this endeavor.
hooray sportsball!
someone’s been working on their side eye
day 14 of the #30daypushupchallenge 
5 sets of 10 for a total of 50 and I’m beginning to regret making this decision.
it’s picture day. the boy dressed himself.
day 13 of the #30daypushupchallenge had me doing 3 sets of 15 for a total of 45 and I think I’ll stay on this floor for now
seriously when the hell did this happen I was not made aware of this ahead of time and honestly this seems a bit excessive.
day 12 of #30daypushupchallenge and I gotta say, I think I nailed this one.
day 11 of the #30daypushupchallenge and all I can say is STRUGGLE BUS.
and here we have mrtobywankenobi keeping an eye on the boy.
day 10 of this #30daypushupchallenge and Alexa is straight up condescending at this point.
day 8 (or 9? I wasn’t paying attention) of #30daypushupchallenge and I think I’ll start putting these in stories because they have to be pretty annoying by now and also exercise is stupid.
day 8 of #30daypushupchallenge and I’m beginning to remember why I hate exercise.
day 7 of the #30daypushupchallenge and just listen to those elbows crack!
it’s a major award!
he’s becoming a real person and WHAT THE HELL
day 6 (I think it skipped one?) of #30daypushupchallenge and I’m beginning to hate Alexa’s voice.
I hate everything about this. #30daypushupchallenge
Day 3 of this stupid “I’m getting old and have to do things now”
stupid 30 day push-up challenge being accountable and damn my form sucks
among other things, mrtobywankenobi is an excellent pillow
lazy Sunday is lazy
this is a nice tree.
final full day of #beachpress and I kinda don’t wanna leave?
not sure if I ever posted these, but confirmed what I’ve basically known my entire life. I’m just a generic white dude 😂
the boy is also not about this bullshit cold
holy shit I found my first business card
I am rather saintly
I just gotta say, this kid has style.
it only took 5 years, but I’ve finally put my actual house number up
someone’s excited for tryouts
my boys
see you in March, Los Angeles
yes, I got my dog an award. he’s earned it.
I’m in a mood, apparently.
holy shit, I have a dining room again. it’s basically been a storage shed since November 2016 because I’m a bad homeowner.
THAT BOY GOOD!
keeping toasty
and so it begins...
I think I nailed it
someone is ready for pajama day at school
the boy is trying to do his best to look distinguished.
rather excited about this
IT’S STAR WARS TIME, BITCHES
and here’s my #2017bestnine. seems pretty appropriate.
this only makes sense to about 14 people but trust me when I say it’s very funny.
we are gonna SCIENCE SOME SHIT today
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 7: I challenge stevegrunwell
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 6: I challenge lizzy_hog
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 4: I challenge brian.bourn
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 4: I challenge betthearm
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 3: I challenge deidre.zinn
7 days, 7 photos in black & white of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend.

Day 2: I challenge tamberalley
7 days, 7 photos in b&w of my everyday life.  No explanation, no people, challenge a friend. 
Day 1 and I tag joeyneill
it was a very special birthday for mrtobywankenobi
I GOT A NEW FAVORITE SHIRT
my boys
this jimelitwalk tattoo has help up pretty damn well for being 15 years old.
the boy has a *lot* of hair
the time my son actually agreed to eat sushi. low and behold, he liked it.
she’s a keeper
probably getting close to the last year I can get this picture.
spoopy at #fest16
been friends with this dude for almost 15 years and he gave me this at #fest16
I Still Love You Julie
#fest16 day 2 (or 4. one of those)
this band has a robot in it #fest16
kicking off #fest16 with Tim Barry
found while walking at #prefest5
what weekend vacation is complete without a ridiculous tattoo?
motorcycle enthusiasts
and we have a preview of his Halloween getup
seriously, he had an awesome time.
someone had fun today
it’s been there THE WHOLE TIME?
GOOD MORNING LARGE PERSON I WOULD LIKE RUBBINS.
WHY DID YOU ALLOW THIS, LARGE PERSON
THANK YOU FOR THE COLD TONGUE FOOD, LARGE PERSON
I AM THINKING ABOUT THE NAP I AM ABOUT TO TAKE, LARGE PERSON
I WILL HOLD YOUR FACE, SMALL PERSON
NO PICTURES, LARGE PERSON
that time my son realized there was a camera on him
holy shit blast from the past
just stopping by
good seats
AND HE STEALS HOME!
I AM ENJOYING MY MORNING NAP, LARGE PERSON
this is 5th grade
ready for the bigs
and so begins the tour of Little League
I AM HAPPY TO BE BACK ON MY BIG SLEEP PAD, LARGE PERSON
sometimes you just gotta get your son’s name in Aurebesh 
#starwars #aurebesh
I have a feeling I’ll be spending a lot of time here.
I WANT TO HEAR YOUR MUSIC WORDS, LARGE PERSON
so that time codyives92 was just there and then sideways.
so I saw this AFTER hanging out with there folks and they're rad as hell
so yeah I was filming inside the Wall Of Death
Anything is peaceful from one thousand, three hundred and fifty-three feet.
THERE IS NO MERCY IN THIS DOJO
Rex has seen worse.
visitor dog is ready for the storm #irmageddon
look, we all deal with stress in our own way, ok? #hurricaneirma #irmageddon
I AM READY FOR THE LONG WET SKYS, LARGE PERSON
oh, you know, just jamming on his LEGO guitar
holy shit, I have a bathroom.
I WILL HELP YOU WITH THE SNAPPING TOYS, LARGE PERSON
I WOULD LIKE YOUR TASTY CIRCLE FOOD, LARGE PERSON
trying his best to be me
the boy decided to butter his bacon because YOLO or some shit like that.
we did nature shit today
THANK YOU FOR JOINING ME ON THIS NAPPING PAD, SMALL PERSON.
I AM PLEASED WITH THIS SLEEP PAD AFTER OUR TRAVELS, LARGE HUMAN.
Bricks were experienced
I WOULD LIKE TO RETURN TO MY NAPPING PAD, LARGE PERSON
I CLIMBED A THING. I'M A CLIMBER.
I VERY MUCH LIKE YOUR NEW TRAVEL BOX, LARGE PERSON.
I also got these tattoos done last night. because why not.
yeah. that happened.
I own this now.
I HAVE REDISCOVERED MY FIRST BED, LARGE PERSON.
and so another year of learning has begun.
this dude starts 5th grade tomorrow and what the hell how did this happen
PAINT ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS
wow. much tile. many lifts.
so I made my own Key Lime Oreo sherbet blizzards because DAMN RIGHT!
I HAS THE TIREDS
clearly he's having a horrible time
and we have achieved the age of 10
gonna rock the hell out of this chess tournament
SUNDOG DOES NOT LIKE THIS LACK OF SUN; EXTRA SNUGGLES REQUIRED.
dude is ready for the game ⚾️
and we're done!
I REQUIRE THIS LIMB FOR HOLDING, LARGE PERSON.
teaching the boy important life lessons
someone is working on their padawan hair
free labor!
WE ARE BEST DOG FRIENDS
I AM SITTING FOR YOUR CLICKING, SMALL PERSON.
You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.
I WILL NAP HERE WITH THE OTHER DOGGO, LARGE PERSON.
finally, my bedroom is done (for now)
the boy has thoughts about things
appropriate hat is appropriate.
someone was hungry
Star Tours is just Captain Nemo.
fast friends
KICK SOME VADER ASS!!!
our Disneyland adventure begins...
legit bedhead is legit
his life doesn't suck
he wastes no time
off for a boy's week of Star Wars and poolside hangs
dude... what happened last night. was there a gnome party or something?
portrait of an almost tween
one of my favorite random things from #wceu 
IT'S NORCROSS COUNTRY, BITCHES!
not sure if this is a French love goatse or what, but it's cool
some legit Paris street art
this was a cool building, as far as buildings go
finishing up my Paris trip with an Eiffel Tower light show. as one does.
COFFEE
not a bad view at all
littleman gave me this on the way to the airport today. soon he'll be too cool for this, but glad he isn't yet.
THANK YOU FOR MY SLEEP WRAPPER, LARGE PERSON.
*someone* is turning into a cool guy
I AM A SVELT DOG LOG NOW.
I've discovered my true form
this is the face of a boy who beat his father for the first time.
OK SMALL HUMAN, YOU MAY REST ON SUNDOG.
I DO NOT LIKE THE LOUD SKY NOISES, LARGE HUMAN.
he was copying me.
This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
I forgot that I own the most amazing piece of art ever.
littleman's 4th grade awards and how is he this old damn it
I SEE THOSE PIZZA ROLLS, LARGE HUMAN. I WOULD LIKE THEM.
SUNDOG IS READY TO RECEIVE PETS
it's all downhill from here, isn't it.
I did not approve of this boy becoming older
DRAW ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS
stumbled on a mamma chicken and some babies yesterday.
highlight of my week
so littleman is making a blueprint for a house as a math assignment and he made a “girl cave” because “they should have one too”. also, note there is no “man cave”. he said “this house is for a cool single lady. or maybe a mom.”
flashback to Father's Day last year #maythe4thbewithyou
double fisted love
I AM A CULINARY GENIUS
throwing some hardcore shade my way
one of us is cool. the other is a parent.
these seats don't suck
MY NAME IS TOBY AND I LOVE YOU ALL.
someone is making faces
some #nationalsiblingday action (and grandma)
easily one of the coolest things I've ever got from speaking at an event.
thankfully getsource brought his coffee rig
OUR DOG NAP PARTY HAS BEEN A SUCCESS, LARGE HUMAN
STOP. GROWING. DAMN. IT.
and we have a Falcon of the Millennium persuasion.
we're almost done
it's almost as though I'm watching myself age
someone got all A's and B's on their report card.
WE ARE JUST DOG FRIENDS DOING DOG FRIEND THINGS
someone's ready for tropical day at school
FUCK YES THIS IS HAPPENING
HELLO I AM ELLE MAE AND I AM YOUR DOG FRIEND FOR A WEEK
he's owning the HELL out of this. proud dad moment for sure.
I had ice cream with a donut for a cone because I love my life
bathroom demo is finally done. just gotta rebuild it 😂
science ice cream!!
I AM HELPING THE LITTLE HUMAN BY NAPPING
the boy takes after his old man
I AM STILL ASLEEP, PERSON. PLEASE LEAVE ME BE.
I CHOOSE THIS NAP PAD NOW, PERSON
having a wild boys night
I AM CONCERNED ABOUT THE CURRENT POLITICAL LANDSCAPE, HUMAN.
I AM FOCUSING ON MY LUNCHTIME NAP, HUMAN.
because of the ever thoughtful itswilwheaton I now have an original chucktingle piece and LIFE COULD NOT GET BETTER.
I AM MAKING THE SOFT FLOOR BETTER, HUMAN
again, rstevens333 takes thoughts out of my brain and puts them on mugs.
mom found a classic school photo. maybe 1996?
someone got a new hat
THE SMALL CHILD IS A SUITABLE NAP PAD
SUNDOG HAS BECOME ONE WITH THE COUCH
I LIKE YOUR NEW SITTING PADS, LARGE HUMAN
decided the best use of my time was to get a tattoo in Salt Lake City
my boy about to start his stand up routine at the school talent show. 
PROUD DAD MOMENT
can't go wrong starting the day with a Chuck Tingle mug
I WILL WAIT FOR THE NEXT FLOOR SLEEPER.
good mug is good.
I AM THE TEMPORARY OFFICE DOG YOU ORDERED, HUMAN.
I HAVE DOUBLED THE NUMBER OF DOGS, LARGE HUMAN.
SUNDOG REQUIRES MORE SOFT THINGS FOR SITTING.
I AM SITTING LIKE A GOOD BOY.
THANK YOU FOR THE SPOON FOOD, LARGE HUMAN. IT IS VERY NICE.
teaching the boy the importance of the classics. tonight's lesson is Mike Tyson's Punch Out
THIS IS A GOOD SUNDOG DAY.
yes I did get a plush Waddles the pig. FIGHTME
just playing Castlevania on my RetroPie. nbd.
it's science time in the Norcross lab
WHY IS THE WARM GONE, LARGE HUMAN?
another day, another awesome rstevens333 mug
I HAVE CLAIMED THIS BLANKET FOR SUNDOGS EVERYWHERE
just a boy and the dog that loves him.
WE SIT IN THE SAME SPACE, SMALL HUMAN
new LEGO build on a rainy day
I FIT ON YOU, SMALL HUMAN
I AM THINKING ABOUT THINGS
he's certainly his father's son.
YouTube has a 5 hour Vader yule log and damn right I'm watching it.
seems pretty well appropriate for a #2016bestnine
new coffee area item is awesome because awesome!
it's starting to look like an actual room 🎉
the boy got pie'd
FROGDOG IS HERE TO HELP
I AM MOONDOG, BROTHER OF SUNDOG
the boy in his element
to you and yours
THANK YOU FOR THE PAPER RIPPING PARTY, LARGE HUMAN!
I ENJOY THIS OUTSIDE SLEEP PAD, LARGE HUMAN
it's a little dusty in here
I have real siding now. things are progressing.
another rstevens333 masterpiece
arriving today, of all days.
THIS IS A GOOD SUNDOG DAY
commemorate and whatnot
the painting has begun (yes those shitty fans are gonna be removed)
progress has continued.
I WILL WATCH THE LOUD HUMANS. YOU CAN COUNT ON ME.
progress was made.
found in the walls behind old wood paneling 😂
gotta say, wordpressdotcom has some pretty sweet swag
littleman playing some puzzle game. he's explaining it to me in broken sentences. it's awesome.
I PUT MY PAW ON A THING FOR YOU, BECAUSE I MISSED YOU.
latest editions to my ever growing mug collection.
is that a toaster strudel ice cream sandwich? DAMN RIGHT IT IS.
I AM NOT WORRIED ABOUT YOUR GENDER NORMS, HUMANS. I AM A PRETTY DOG.
good times were had by all #wcus
HELLO LARGE HUMAN, I AM HAVING FUN AND MISS YOU.
finally got to meet and hang out in deansabatino last night. good times were had by all.
tfw when you end up at a kick ass house show to see friends play music
and my taco tattoo is complete. me and dremeda, after many years, finally made it happen
someone's got a girlfriend...
I AM DOING GAMES AT THE VACATION, LARGE HUMAN
THIS IS PERFECT SUNDOG WEATHER, LARGE PERSON.
thanks to blackcrowcoffeeco I'm now a male model.
THANK YOU FOR MY BIRTHDAY HAT, HUMANS. I AM 7 NOW.
...and we're done. time for lego chess!!
an epic lego build is about to begin
littleman had ideas about things during dinner. as one does.
get me on the court and I'm trouble
getting to see the stage filled with the crowd for OWTH at #fest15 is why I went. an amazing weekend.
a regular father and son picture.
when T-Rex attacks!
just doin' my thing
costume prep work
I AM CHECKING THE AREA FOR POTENTIAL SNUGGLES, LARGE HUMAN. WILL REPORT BACK.
how some of us pregame #fest15
WHY IS EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT APPLES, LARGE HUMAN?
today was
I AM NO LONGER TOBY, I AM SUNDOG.
thanks to the folks at fsgprints I now have a shirt I can believe in!
trying to drink his beverage through his eyeballs, apparently.
starting my day off right
it's a wild Saturday with Scoobert Doobert and friends.
some new additions to my ever-expanding mug collection
My son... moustache you a question
fucking AWESOME show
THANKFUL THIS PERSON VOTING IS ALMOST DONE, LARGE HUMAN!
some new random minifigs for the collection
ANY TIME CAN BE NAPTIME, HUMANS!
got me some new specs!
doin' my Sunday right
I AM READY FOR THE SLEEP TIME, LARGE HUMAN
oh HELL YES I am looking forward to this darkmattercoffee blend
somehow my son became a unicorn overnight ¯_(ツ)_/¯
just some Friday night chess and coffee
I HAVE BECOME ONE WITH THE NAP.
regardless of where you go, a piece of Florida seems to always be there.
LET'S BURNINATE SOME SHIT!!!
I AM HAVING A NICE TIME AT YOUR FRIEND WATCHER HOME!
appropriate holiday shirt is appropriate.
my son gives zero fucks about your rigid gender assumptions. (this was 5 years ago, too)
this is the meds my dad takes on a DAILY FUCKING BASIS.

Norcross men don't die.
I WILL PROTECT YOU WITH SNUGGLES, SMALL HUMAN.
I THINK YOU CALL THIS A HIGH-FIVE, LARGE HUMAN! #nationaldogday
LITTLE HUMAN, I WILL NAP WHILE YOU DO THE COLOR STRINGS.
WELL, ACTUALLY, I AM FEDORABLE
I AM READY FOR ADVENTURE, HUMANS
Oreo Churros? They're real, and they're fantastic.
I won't stop believing, valleyofsickness. you better fucking believe it. (and thanks!!)
... but it got done
yesterday's feels
I'm a big fan of child labor.
WE ARE TEAMWORKING, SMALLER HUMAN
I WILL NAP NEAR YOU, LARGE HUMAN
back to school... back to school...
WHY ARE YOU AWAKE HUMANS?
oh, he's turning 9, you say? how'd you tell?
watching the National. achievement unlocked!
this is my cold brew dream setup
HELLO LARGE HUMAN, I AM HAVING FUN.
welp. looks like Chuck E Cheese infected the boy with lice. now he's buzzed. all ears and teeth 😔
welp. nice knowin' ya, son
someone is gonna turn 9
HELLO LARGE HUMAN I WOULD LIKE TO WATCH THE MOVING THINGS.
I caught one of those Pokemon things people keep talking about.
just waiting for some pizza. as one does.
THANK YOU FOR WRAPPING ME IN MY SLEEP COVER, LARGE HUMAN.
found my favorite ginger beer in Florida for the first time 🎉
finally getting to try thelabtampa and I suggest you do the same.
cold brew anyone? if you wanna make your own? I built a calculator http://norcross.co/cc
don't argue with coffee
and now the boy starts his coffee shop skills
raising the next generation of WordPress folks
training the boy to get his ice cream game better
got this when gramps died. coming up on 5 years since he passed. still miss the hell out of him.
again with the being cool
road trip time!!!
finally organized my shirts properly
he's crafty
time to start working through my backlog of coffee ☕️
my boy saw his first drag show 🎉
so yes. fun was had.
SPACESHIP!!!!!!!!
the boy got some new shades 😎
everyone loves a conference  #awwwardsnyc
SNUGGLE PARTIES WITH LITTLE HUMANS MAKES ME HAPPY
I DO NOT LIKE THE LOUD AIR BOOMS, LARGE HUMAN.
the boy's hair is getting a little ridiculous.
my new rstevens333 ashtray is an accurate description of my feelings on life.
go sportsteam!!
damn right I did
legit neon sign is legit
go sportsteam!
I am gonna drink the SHIT out of this stuff
GGGOOOO SPORTS TEAM!
let's bocci some shit up
DID YOU KNOW IT IS SUNDOG SEASON, LARGE HUMAN??
someone got 3 oinking pigs at their skating party. WHOO BOY!
taking the boy out for a cheesesteak and a root beer. TREAT OUR SELVES.
another batch of cold brew in the books
you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.
HOLY SHIT I HAVE CHEWABLE COFFEE
beached out
beach kids doin' beach stuff
WELCOME HOME YOU HAVE NEW SMELLS I MUST SMELL THEM NOW.
coffee is a flat circle
and then sarcasmically made a new friend.
and then sarcasmically crossed the happy boozin' line
Rays win!!!
time for some goddamn baseball!
the schoolyard slayer
silly rooster, we all know you can't use the banking system.
one of the many reasons I love this place.
HUMAN LET US DO THE DAY SLEEP ON THE LARGE SITTING PAD TOGETHER.
and then THIS happened and jesusfuckingchrist this is amazing
holy shit I'm gonna eat this and probably die and I'm alright with that.
those hands don't lie
homemade Reese's Cup Oreo ice cream sandwiches because I love America.
I AM A PRETTY GIRL. MY NAME IS MABEL.
welcome to Florida
I am an art collector
CAN I HAVE SOME OF YOUR PEOPLE FOOD?
corn doggin' it
I CAN SLEEPS LIKE YOU DO, HUMAN
FUCK YEAH GIRL SCOUT COOKIES
PLEASE DO WHAT YOU CALL A HIGH FIVE WITH ME HUMAN IT LOOKS FUN
hello high school music tastes
the always beautiful sarcasmically in her natural state
THANK YOU FOR THE EXTRA PADDING ON MY NAP PLACE HUMAN!
post-op coffee. like one does.
YES LITTLE HUMAN, I LIKE ALL THE RUBBINS!
true love
party turtles at #wcmia
someone got a Star Wars / Deadpool themed cast.
someone's about to get a lot of attention at school
respect the lazy
and Yoda watches over the wounded
fractured arm, cartoons all day.
sometimes the ground wins 😕
WE WILL FLANK THE LITTLE HUMAN WITH NAPS!
sneaky graffiti
SUNDOG REQUIRES CHARGING TO REACH FULL SUNDOG POTENTIAL.
who doesn't need more style in their life?
back when heathenlife_design and I used to nerd out in my attic.
SUNDOG LIKES ALL TEMPERATURES. ALL HAIL SUNDOG.
shoulder cover up before and after. nerdneil did a stellar job as always
SNUGGLE ME, LITTLE HUMAN!
as always, publix ice cream is ON POINT
O captain my captain.
portrait of an artist of a portrait.
my little prize fighter
teaching the kids about the classic works.
friend dogs are pretty sweet.
I felt it was important to own this book.
I made a friend today.
so THIS is happening
damn right Milhouse is in the center. #2015bestnine
lil Biscuit is bringing in the new year proper
breaking out the Rok for the first time. EXCITED. thanks mrchrislema !
inspirational mug is inspirational.
new mug!
to you and yours, a very merry Christmas
SANTA GOT ME LITTLE HUMAN SNUGGLES!
the always amazing sarcasmically got me a new ornament
I AM ONE OF THE LITTLE HUMANS NOW!
so blevins__ just sent me the most METAL COFFEE I'VE EVER SEEN.
THANK YOU FOR TUCKING ME IN HUMAN, I WILL SEE YOU IN THE MORNING FOR SNUGGLES
Rebel Alliance or GTFO. thanks alectattoos for the nice work!
the kids got loose in the hotel apparently 😎
not a bad view of the city
I AM GOOD AT THE NAPPING, HUMAN!
the Norcross Christmas tree is now done.
that time Littleman decided to butter his bacon. AMERICA!
I MUST SNIFF ALL THE THINGS
RUBBINS. I REQUIRE RUBBINS!
got me a couch snuggler
and finishing up with The War, because you're goddamn right they did.
a little acoustic Lucero set before the full electric Lucero set. life ain't bad.
island life would be something we could do 😎
my little seasonal asthma pony
GIVE ME RUBBINS LITTLE HUMAN!
even overcast is nice.
almost 14 years later, my jimelitwalk piece is *still* looking sharp as hell.
this is probably true.
my latest drewtoothpaste mug is quite possibly perfection.
only felt right to wear the Alex King memorial shirt at my first WordPress event since receiving it #wcorl
well done Alofts, you are S.M.R.T. for the #wcorl folks
caught a little intruder!
SUNDOG RIDES AGAIN!
my niece giving me the rundown on all the Disney princesses. and you're damn right I listened.
the WordPress folks are the *best*.
another rstevens333 mug in my collection. thanks zaoweb !
I think the hip kids call this
ITS SUNDAY SNUGGLETIME WITH THE LITTLE HUMAN!
I call this costume
the hunt begins...
SPOOPY!!!
Lagwagon tearing it up last night. saw them the first time in 1994 #bigprefestinlittleybor #getoffmylawn
Fallingwater. LEGO. Saturday fun.
fuck yes this is happening.
I'm trying Mr Mug. I'm trying.
if you’ve never listened to The Horrible Crowes, I’d get on that.
I'll still take the
cover up in progress. soon no sign of the old piece will be there.
the orange is back to its former glory!
if we're being honest, I'm just a vessel for coffee.
pretty much decided on what my next tattoo will be. this will be a bitchin' neck piece
they weren't lying.
random sidewalk facts at wordcamptampa #wctpa
FLAMENCO!!! at the wordcamptampa VIP dinner
getting wordcamptampa shirts and fighting off roosters because Florida
the back patio is protected by a wrought iron cat.

feelin' safe, you guys.
my view for the next week for wordcamptampa not too shabby
best sweatshirt ever? YES IT IS.
just a boy and his TIE Fighter LEGO set. (FYI the mirror is the reason he has 4 ears)
WE CAN SHARE THE SITTING PLACE, LITTLE HUMANS!
coffee station v3 is operational, thanks to sarcasmically getting me an espresso machine!
Hi Bobadillo welcome to the family.
I AM A BABY, HUMAN. CUDDLE ME.
derp face for 11th birthday ice cream.
it's been real.
yeah. Palm Springs is *totally* like Detroit and Compton. fucking identical lit palm trees.
and here we have mulegirl wearing the finest the Ace Hotel has to offer.
even without drinkin' I know they ain't wrong.
thanks again to the mega talented and all around swell human being robynkanner for the new mug!
out with sarcasmically last night for a birthday dinner at Bern's
I HAVE BOTH LITTLE HUMANS IN MY SNUGGLE ZONE. THIS IS GOOD, LARGE HUMAN.
SXSW 2010 when I first met markjaquith (and he took the pic)
another batch of caffeine mints. SO GOOD.
whippin' up some cold brew coffee. 'tis the season. 
I made a quick calculator with the recipe here: http://norcross.co/cc
I AM HERE FOR MORAL SUPPORT HUMAN. I HAVE NO THUMBS SO I CANNOT BUILD.
LOVE ME, HUMAN. I NEED THE RUBBINS.
I PROMISE I FIT IN THE CHAIR, HUMAN
home ownership RULES
mornin'
Moose has no time for your preconceived notions about dog bed usage.
WE FIT GOOD, HUMAN. WE WILL LAY TOGETHER NOW.
you underestimate the power...of the marshmallows.
just got our new mugs from goatstory and not gonna lie, they're rad as hell
one more week of bachelorhood.
they labeled his bandage for me.
IT'S SO FLUFFY!!
she's still a little stage-5 clinger.
HARSES HARSES
HELLO NEW HUMAN I MUST TASTE YOU TO VERIFY ACCEPTANCE.
C is for HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS COOKIE
OH SHIT CHURRO DOG HAPPENED
OH SHIT CHURRO DOG IS HAPPENING
the kids were visited by the ghost head of Randy Johnson
Chase Field ✔️
so here's sarcasmically enjoying some sheep action.
HUMAN, I AM WORKING ON SUNDOG II: RETURN OF SUNDOG
HUMAN, WE ARE CUDDLING NOW.
THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE, HUMAN. I DO NOT CARE FOR THIS.
I am my father's son. There is no doubt.
engine yard
boy's into building things. what can I say.
A++ would eat again
honor roll all year. no awards for behavior. takes after his daddy.
grill happy.
it's a major award.
and so it begins...StrungOut is about to melt some faces
Florida has its perks.
slow the FUCK DOWN kale. you're not fooling anyone. 
seriously. you're embarrassing yourself.
it's Crystal Pepsi all over again. also, it's not bad.
new Twinkie flavors. it's our Sophie's Choice (we went with chocolate filled, btw)
EVERYTHING'S COMING UP MILHOUSE!
MOAR COFFEE
ice cream and espresso because things are awesome. SF has its coffee game on point.
SPORTSBALL!!1!
nice bonus en route to the movie
I AM NO LONGER TOBY. I AM SUNDOG.
WE ARE SNUGGLING, LADY HUMAN. NOT WORKING. SNUGGLING.
I HAVE A BELLY! EVERYONE LOOK AT MY BELLY!
I LIKE YOUR SLEEP PAD HUMAN I THINK WE WILL SHARE IT NOW THANK YOU.
baseball selfie because baseball.
my boy's hair all Wolverine'd itself
YES TINY HUMAN I LIKE THE NOISES YOUR FINGERS MAKE PLEASE CONTINUE.
THANK YOU FOR THE SLEEP SNUGGLES HUMAN.
FaceFace is inheriting clothes from sarcasmically so here we are.
and here we have sarcasmically doing the golf.
one cool taco indeed.
upped our candy game to THE NEXT LEVEL.
like a boss. because she is.
I AM ENJOYING MY SLEEP PAD TIME LARGE HUMAN AND YOU SHOULD GO TO YOURS
not gonna lie. probably the coolest credit card I've ever had.
FaceFace is all set for a day at Disney.
I think the number of fucks given here is around -4, give or take.
WELCOME HOME LARGE HUMAN I HAVE PREPARED THE SLEEP PAD FOR YOU.
Elvis hangs out in Grapevine, Texas apparently.
LABOR!
my wife sarcasmically brings me home coffee from trips because she loves me.
GOOD SNUGGLING THERE, LITTLE SNUGGLER. KEEP UP THE GOOD SNUGGLES.
their nap game is ON POINT.
WELCOME HOME LITTLE SNUGGLER I MISSED YOU.
Moose gave me a napping five. DRAGONPAWS.
HELLO I AM SUNDOG
busy flight schedule at Chattanooga Metropolitan Airport.
our final Tennessee morning. it's been fun.
rustic sink is rustic.
this creepy ass painting is in our cabin room. haunting my sleep.
we did a nature today.
Littleman is acclimating to the mountains rather well.
smore'in up.
apparently my GIANT RED PICKUP TRUCK wasn't visible enough for this person on the interstate to run into me.
LITTLE HUMAN, TELL ME A STORY. AND RUB MY BELLY.
yes, I bought a Ron Burgundy LEGO minifig.
HUMAN WE WILL SHARE THIS HIGHBED WE BOTH FIT I AM SURE OF IT
HUMAN, I AM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR BODYSPACE FOR A WHILE THANK YOU.
y'all thought I was kidding. SKILLET COOKIE MOTHERFUCKER!
DO NOT WORRY HUMAN I WILL WARMCLOTH MYSELF THIS EVENING.
HELLO I AM YOUR DOG VISITOR. I CLAIM YOUR LAP FOR TINY DOGS EVERYWHERE.
I HAZ NAP FACE.
YES HUMAN I WILL SLEEP ON YOUR SLEEP PLACE WITH YOU.
making homemade ice cream sammys because sarcasmically is a culinary genius.
DO NOT WORRY HUMAN I WILL WRAP MYSELF IN THE WARMCLOTHS.
remember that time I gave a professional development talk dressed as Ron Burgundy? I love my life.
YES SMALL HUMAN, I WOULD ENJOY SHARING THIS CHAIR WITH YOU.
centurians need not apply
so FaceFace tucked Toby into his bed and he let her do it because he's an 80lb sweetheart.
why yes, that IS sarcasmically playing Yoshi's Cookie on the SNES.
Win a FREE Pass to SquaresConf! Ends Friday evening http://squaresconference.com/gotosquares  #GoToSquares #Squares2015
THE LITTLE TALKING PILLOWS ARE GOOD.
schmoop
HUMAN, YOUR MOUTHFOOD LOOKS DIFFERENT THAN MINE AND I WOULD LIKE IT PLEASE.
THIS SMALL HUMAN MAKES A GOOD PILLOW I SHALL LAY HERE.
HUMAN, I AM HAVING MY POST BREAKFAST NAP AND WOULD APPRECIATE YOU LEAVING ME BE.
Florida child is not built for this shit.
so while Moose is freaking out while sarcasmically is gone, Toby is all LOVE ME
she's gonna give me a stroke in about 5-7 years. mark it.
she decided she wants to learn how to play. ok then.
hello 2015. let's drink some coffee.
goodbye Stanley, you were super nice to us.
VIP balcony for the murderbydeath show because sometimes things just go your way.
making the kids wait while Grandma gets ready. they are literally vibrating.
HUMAN, WE NAP NOW.
it's a tradition. weirdest tree angel ever.
let's go Back To The Future where my kids are still little.
the only star worth a damn.
she's 7 now. not sure exactly what's next.
HUMAN, THIS
PAINT ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS
just chillin' after my CCL surgery. no big deal.
givin this stuff a spin. it's pretty darn tasty!
LITTLE HUMAN IS A+ SNUGGLER
finally sitting down to build this little LEGO masterpiece.
YES PLEASE SCRATCH THING THING YOU CALL MY
I HEAR THINGS OUT THERE, LARGE HUMAN. I SHOULD GO LOOK.
YES I AM SNUGGLING WITH THE LITTLE HUMAN AND I LIKE IT.
so that happened.
yes humans, I shall sleep here for the night.
yes tiny person I will hold your glowing handthing.
Toby sits like a frog. like a 75lb frog.
pups adjusting pretty good to each other, well, existing.
I like this floor.
you mean I get to STAY HERE???
HI MY NAME IS TOBY YOU ARE MY PERSON NOW.
the crime scene. Moose realized they were goddamn potatoes and stopped.
I don't know how you all see it, but when it comes to the children, Wu-Tang is for the children.
'MURICA!
SSSPPPPOOOOOPPPPPYYYY
Moose had a ponder, it seems.
filed under
Rollin' with the Moose
party on Wayne. party on Garth.
hey, it's sarcasmically being sportsball!
so sarcasmically got new office art. NAME THAT FILM!!
my amazing wife got me a new (old) coffee mug and life is good.
apparently my kids are prepping for the Nerf-acolypse.
so FaceFace got the older iPod from her brother and is now texting and God help us all.
leaving Minneapolis. fancy time is over.
I am guarding my people from things. this is important.
more home improvement is happening. we're gonna get this houe
Moose gave me a high-five this morning. So I got that going for me.
Moose is on the case. not sure what the case is, but he's on it.
NOM ALL THE THINGS!!!
my wife shames bad food.
hall monitor Moose
test driving the #wctpa mug and it's legit.
WHO DOESN'T LIKE A PIG PARTE?!??
my 6 year old daughter made a donut with hair because of course she did.
finally breaking open this bad boy.
birthday gift from my folks: a limited edition rare Star Wars book. AAHHH YYEEEAAHHH
guess who has two thumbs and found their really old lego sets? THIS GUY
new genesisdesignpro swag? with our new logo? why yes. yes it is.
this is a thing now. good job everyone.
...ladies
trainin' the kids. (it's not coffee, don't worry)
ask not for whom the Moose tolls. it tolls for thee.
watch as Moose never lets the bread hit the ground.
FaceFace before her first day of 1st grade yesterday. STOP GROWING UP!
my new mug arrived.
a little after dinner reading
good morning MR. BREAKFAST
someone modded a Suburban and a Mack truck because 'MURICA!!
littleman making a balloon animal. yes, it looks like a penis.
digging through my old lego collection at my folks house, found Benny and his buddies.
been rocking the plaid since the beginning #tbt
let's do it Thursday.
littleman finished another Lego build. he's a damn machine.
in case you were wondering, yes sarcasmically keeps her candy stored like a science lab.
two new monitors (and cables) later, Norcross CommandCenter™ 4.0 is up and running.
digging through my box of random computer shit and found this fossil
another successful Lego Saturday: Star Wars AT-AP
someone is excited that his little people are coming home tomorrow!!
this littleman is gonna be 7 next week. NOT SUPPOSED TO GROW UP DAMN IT.
ice cream marshmallows are a thing and they are beautiful.
fun fact: my dad's haircut as a young man inspired the Lego minifig cut.
I've had this mug for over 20 years now.
some fancy espresso to pregame #frontendconf
SPACESHIP!!! (and littleman)
the helmet comes pre-cracked. good attention to detail lego
the two biggest loves in my life...together!
helpful Lego man is helpful.
folks, sarcasmically wasn't kidding when she said she was cleaning in roller skates.
baseball with sarcasmically. the things she does for me.
don't ever say that the Norcross home isn't filled with classy art.
spaceship spaceship SPACESHIP
don't worry person, I'll drive.
littleman Lego Sunday
some extra Simpsons Lego swag I picked up at the register yesterday.
if you'll pay close attention, you'll see Han shot first.
waiting for liftoff on the skyride
littleman is excited. fun will be had.
snapped this at #beachpress. apparently in Oregon they do hand / crab replacement surgery on children.
got my new darkmattercoffee mug!!
found an old family picture at my parent. MEMBERS ONLY JACKET FTW
helped move grandma into an ALF last night. got one of gramp's old mugs in exchange. I'll take it.
some Moose lovin with sarcasmically
Moose has the opposite of a stiff upper lip
we got Moose some special dog ice cream because we've become
so FaceFace shared some art with us. she calls it
someone made this on CafePress and sent it to me. I don't know who, but they are amazing.
made a cutoff sleeved shirt for my daughter because AMERICA
riding out for haircuts with littleman
SNUGGLE ME DAMN IT
....and done
sometimes you gotta say
remember when I found the racist plantation mural wallpaper in my house? GOOD TIMES!
my 55lb napping lap dog.
Barnaby: the sunbasset
Barnaby required cuddles. I was not in a position to say no.
Barnaby and FaceFace enjoying some cartoon time. as you do.
WE HAVE A SNUGGLER!
someone's a hugger!
so...we have a new rescue basset. say hello to Barnaby.
umm guys? sarcasmically made MINI SMORE PIES and she wins life.
delivery #2. my wallet is empty but finally some nice appliances.
new shit! #homeownerboner
all office art finally hung. apparently I'm one Star Wars art piece short.
21 years old and under the influence of numerous drugs and booze. #tbt
pretty sweet that sarcasmically lets me have pr0n mags sent to the house.
this face is ready for relaxation. can't let a small stoke interfere with 3rd nap of the day.
now I can finally start building my Lego sets again, since they can have a place to go when done.
damn right it is.
found this in my art pile. don't remember buying it. I seem to have a lot of Star Wars art.
finally figured out what to do with those green stirring things from Starbucks.
munchin on the lawn. as you do. #pigstagram
I'm still a lap pig, daddy! #pigstagram
someone didn't wanna let go of their blankey #pigstagram
LOOK AT MY SNOUT DADDY #pigstagram
I've set the over / under at 14 for when this one causes me to stroke out.
Daisy is snugglin' to avoid the cold. work be damned. #pigstagram
they each had their toy. not sure who was mirroring who.
Daisy nappin with mommy #pigstagram
Daisy having a morning snack #pigstagram
hey Mama, got something for me? #pigstagram
Daisy is really into the Globes #pigstagram
gettin' some Daisy snuggles #pigstagram
FRIENDSHIP (Burt has a new home with a new best friend)
belly runs? belly rubs.
daddy's little Sith Lord
Burt says GOOD MORNING TO YOU
someone was not happy about having to go potty before Justified #pigstagram
sleeping dog house
looks like Burt is adjusting just fine.
what's over here?
Burt is checkin new things out.
makin' faces with FaceFace
my latest rstevens333 mug in the collection
Daisy does not care that I have work to so #pigstagram
FaceFace is getting her derp on.
my ladies are roller tough
soon to be queen of the selfies
looks like I'll be busy for the next forever.
Maya the red nosed hyper child
daddy got new Star Wars Legos!
so...it's a drum set?
Christmas Eve with the wee one.
Daisy is chair nappin' in her Christmas blanket #pigstagram
old man Moose is getting some rubbins
dog bed? I don't see any dogs. #pigstagram
daddy's little patient
someone's having a birthday! #pigstagram
check out sarcasmically 's new Christmas swag!
I came here for two things: rootin' grass and snugglin'. and I'm out of grass. #pigstagram
even Daisy wants in on the coffee action #pigstagram
verdict? best coffee maker I've ever had.
coming in from a morning root of the yard #pigstagram
Daisy loves playing Hungry Hungry Hippos #pigstagram
and our tree topper, a few years running now
we love the holidays
prepping for the Norcross holiday card photo
the ham overate #pigstagram
Daisy made herself a blanket peek hole #pigstagram
all tucked in #pigstagram
how our kitchen welcomes guests
go ahead and get comfortable, Daisy #pigstagram
Daisy is getting some grooming #pigstagram
now its properly hung
so Daisy went and made her own bedding on the couch #pigstagram
Daisy does not like cold #pigstagram
sunpig #pigstagram
Nobody's Darlings
The War
Chain Link Fence
Bikeriders
Kiss the Bottle
so much ugly carpet.
apparently we have faux brick flooring in the house
the boy is a beanstalk for his school day
Daisy pretty much demands now that I tuck her in at night. in my recliner #pigstagram
hoodie on a pig? HOODIE ON A PIG. #pigstagram
the pups keeping an eye on the sickboy
snugglin' with her pony. because of course. #pigstagram
fuck your pumpkin spice whatever, THIS is the season to get excited about.
pensive Daisy is pensive #pigstagram
Daisy likes her blanket #pigstagram
I caught Daisy spooning sarcasmically #pigstagram
drunk on grass and lookin' for love #pigstagram
caught sarcasmically and Daisy chair nappin' #pigstagram
and so it begins.
SNUGGLES! NOW! #pigstagram
loungedogs
Old Man Moose
snugglin' with mamma #pigstagram
proof that at one point in my life, I voluntarily did shit outdoors. and SPORTSBALL #tbt
nap near kitchen, get food? #pigstagram
swim day. hopefully this will wear them out a bit.
my old man enjoys his cigars
straight pimpin' 1985 style #tbt
the Zoolander ant farm my boy got for his birthday.
gettin' some rubbins #pigstagram
ready for sportsball #pigstagram
struttin' #pigstagram
guys, sarcasmically made BBQ  pulled pork stuffed potatoes. because she's amazing.
facesnuggle due to the storm #pigstagram
blanket nap #pigstagram
lawn service #pigstagram
...ladies
after senior prom. I believe I had just smoked my weight in pot and drank half a fifth of whiskey, if memory serves right. #tbt
looks legit
FaceFace, the hobo. this little princess starts kindergarten tomorrow.
it says
me and Muppet Burt #bestgiftever
Littleman's work at last night's Lego party. no help from me. not bad for just turning 6.
tough livin' #pigstagram
...and we're done
let's go
it even comes with instructions!
me and Littleman having a Lego party. as you do.
this is basically what my bachelor life looks like.
looks like my plans have been made for tonight
so...how many of your spouses have gotten you a FUCKIN BURT REYNOLDS MUPPET? what? none? just mine?
semi-toothless
she likes a clean edge #pigstagram
flexible, and no fucks given.
she nudged me into my recliner for snuggles #pigstagram
so mikemcalister sends me coffee with a pseudo love note. I'm gonna assume the hearts are for the coffee.
someone got a game ball yesterday. hasn't let go of it since.
Rays aren't playing well, but we're having fun.
baseball for birthday
christening my new wpengine pint glass the only way I know how: coffee
snuggles after surgery #pigstagram
behind bars #pigstagram
lookin for leftovers #pigstagram
Popsicle thief #pigstagram
so FaceFace drew a picture of Daisy. Daisy is peeing. ART.
finally cleaning out the graveyard. so much old shit.
diabetes never tasted so good
stickers!
look who fell asleep together watching Ghost Hunters #pigstagram
sunpig #pigstagram
Daisy is in heat #pigstagram
always bringing your A game, Publix.
baseball!!
obligatory
not a bad view in DC
all legit and shit
it's a hard pig life #pigstagram
I am Daisy, mower (and destroyer) of lawns #pigstagram
yes, my pig has her own ball pit. don't be jealous. #pigstagram
doctors office. apparently my cough doesn't sound pleasant.
they love their mamma
caught someone suitcase nappin' #pigstagram
guess who's home! #pigstagram
proof that yes, I am capable of relaxing.
I'M ON A BOAT!
and here we have sarcasmically being VACATION AS FUCK
god damn this stuff is delicious.
she's basically an infant #pigstagram
iced coffee in a mason jar. its summertime, folks.
actual progress made!!
nappin' #pigstagram
Daisy does not like storms #pigstagram
pre-k graduation day
Daisy made a pigfort
pig belly rubs #FTW
not gonna lie, #pigsnuggle is awesome
I am in charge of snuggling with the pig after dinner. #lovehome
no...YOU just bought a pound of caffeinated mints.
pigface
piggle lovin'
Moose says
I'm actually trying this. FOR SCIENCE
I've owned this coffee mug for almost 20 years. and its still awesome.
that cannot be comfortable.
pig chillin' with sarcasmically
more pig napping
Daisy and Penny are nap friends
'MURICA!
straight chillin' poolside.
yes, that's wallpaper behind wallpaper. because FUCK GOD DAMN
still get excited about cereal toys
morning pigsnuggle
breakfast with the boy
pretty excited to try this. thanks phillian !
everyone gets a rub!
her kingdom
her kingdom
demo is getting there.
demo is getting there.
rockin
rockin
yeah. I just upped my game.
pig nap
rootin'
rootin'
had to take a pig break.
pig nap!
Daisy sunbathes
look who became nap friends!
holy shit she's beautiful
roach crawled into the candle wax when it was hot. then died. dumbass.
helping daddy work
Mamma and her snugglepig
checking out the bedding options
I have a lap pig. I am a guy who has a lap pig
THE PIG IS HERE! THE PIG IS HERE!
post-Lego cartoon time
building
the brilliance of rstevens333 is fueling my day
that Moose. always sleeping.
the meat. this was delicious
monkey piñata
and here is sarcasmically in full BBQ mode
there is just something sexy about a smoker full of ribs
setting up the gravillion all proper
tough life, that Moose has.
they still fuckin' got it.
this. is. happening.
post knee scrape cartoon therapy
first of many scrapes in the bike riding
someone is upset that he has to eat his dinner.
Moose on shag
no training wheels LIKE A BOSS
testing (ignore) #NorcrossTest
and a #NorcrossTest from instagram
and the finished product. ITS RIB TIME
making magic happen
sarcasmically posing for my new Tumblr
we're both waking up
a well traveled man
heartbreaker
my only real goal for 2013: get this running
firewood made of coffee. because I am dedicated.
this. is. happening.
house is finally starting to come together
morning java
I have a Lego mug. you argument is invalid.
of all the wallpaper in the house, this is the most amazing
my favorite part. getting ready to thrash the RV
ready to redneck
this is sarcasmically's post-move face.

still hotter than hell.
Norcross Command Center™ v4 is coming along nicely
guys, sarcasmically is a regular Speed Racer
chocolate dipped frozen Key Lime Pie IS HAPPENING!
plane ride down to the Keys
true statement is true.
caught sarcasmically in a rare, relaxed southern moment
morning meh
new dog is a foot dog.
we are now a dual-dog family. say hello to Penny.
yes. yes I am.
possessed Moose
Nexus camera. Tolerable.
Moose been huntin naps this mornin
bringing in 2013 right
shark attack
I wonder how this did in the theaters. it had a guy from Charles In Charge!
apparently we no longer keep adult band-aids in the house anymore.
skele-boy
cookie time
DAMN RIGHT WE GOT THE BEAR PAINTING
that's how the internet gets made, kids.
my dad got the kids a chocolate MRSA fountain. bold power troll move.
solving the world's problems. or eating a donut.
reason 334729204 why sarcasmically is the most amazing ever
Lego jams for the boys. they've been quiet for almost an hour now.
ridin in style
devouring his Christmas bread
a very Lego Christmas
surrounded by gifts
blinded by the stuff
SHE IS EXCITE
spoiled fucking rotten, they are.
bribes
Christmas Eve snuggles
FaceFace droppin knowledge at the diner
Saturday night code test
AAAHHHHH YYYYEEEEAAAHHHHHH
birthday weekend coming to a close.
winding down after a day at Universal
thanks to chrislema, I've graduated to full baller status
chatting with The Captain
my boo
someone is pleased to be here
brudders
birthday card for sister
princess party
just a boy and his green beans.
from the roof of RavenTools
Moose is sad to see me leave.
she's crafty. and it happens that she's also my type.
and we're done. new hand tattoo is...well...awesome
mug mug mug
and so it begins
Moose is an excellent Jenga player
this is our Christmas tree angel. there are many like it, but this one is mine.
today's coffee consumption vessel. (zippo for context)
his life does not suck
silly child is silly
TV time
this is happening in my life
new mug courtesy of betthearm because he's nice like that
this cuteness courtesy of alphabet_junkie
behaving rather well, considering her brother is sick and thus getting all the attention
I LOVE THIS GODDAMN FACE
napper dog
she's a natural baby holder.
RJ Reynolds is in the holiday spirit.
she's not stoned, I swear.
holy shit I'm gonna own this.
bonin' Moose
guys, sarcasmically is a delicate flower.
hey good lookin
my little patient for today. littleman is a puke factory today.
GAME. CHANGER.
I am a good parent
lets all be honest here. Moose has final say over where he sleeps.
homeboy's workin HARD.
this face is gonna thrash me
this is sarcasmically 's pre-RIB DESTRUCTION face
this is happening. today.
cool guy is cool
zombie gnomes? yes.
a true coffee fan grows their own. ya know, in case of the apocalypse
this better be the only woody my boy is smiling about for years
my lovely genius wife
outlaws
parenthood
Bart is moving in on sarcasmically
one of them is clearly stoned.
kickin ass with some DOOM
with accomplice
roadie
amused
the crew
idols
DADDY CAN WE HAVE FUN NOW?!?!?!
busted Gramps swiping some of the kids food.
kickin it with Abe
lounge Moose
my piglet niece
heading home from #wpcs in Tybee. ready for my family and my bed. 5 hours to go.
a Cuban coffee stash for dremeda
guys. sarcasmically made ROFFles this morning. cinnamon rolls made into waffles. AMAZING
so dremeda thought I was kidding when I said my dad's humidor was a China cabinet
readin boys
picture day
sniffin for kid leftovers
mini golf at 9 am. family life FTW
mornin
this dog does not understand struggle. not. one. bit.
faces. we make'em
they're playing
GPOY: cruisin edition
well played, Monday
GENIUS!
waiting for the small person to drop food.
this is some good shit.
and no fucks were given
bipartisanship!
yes. yes I will. thanks markjaquith!
well played, Howard Ave.
fruit roll-up PBJ wraps. MIND IS BLOWN
dare I say it? en fuego
I'm an excellent driver
a schooner IS a sailboat
GPOM
that's entertainment
cartoons before school.
coffee friends
this is happening
someone's ready
Moose snuggle
in which my lovely wife sarcasmically vamps it up
cool enough for school
Star Wars robe with Spongebob pants. of course.
my child boxed herself. because why not.
tough life
disco never died
bustin' a move
well, that escalated quickly
the gang
flower power
tough life, that Moose.
so sarcasmically and I got new clothes. guess which one belongs to who.
silly girls
Run-DMMoose
mohawk town
my awesome lunch date
dog heaven
from the archives...sibling love.
BACON. PIE. IS. HAPPENING.
30 seconds ago, he was proclaiming how not tired he was.
chillin'
sideview moose
getting the snide eye. I get that a lot.
I leave the house for 1 HOUR and this is what I come home to.
school daze
wait Daddy, I have to finish my snake
Lorax dance party
uncle heathenlife is a regular maypole
birthday girl
FaceFace decided that the lower case
yes, that's an autographed photo of Burt Reynolds in my office
geez Daddy, I'm a big boy now.
first day.
learning
duck butt
cannot. sit. still.
busted
my 5 year old built this. by himself. there is no doubt that he's my boy
coding buddy
best thing about having coworkers? GIFTS. blueglass is good people
Sad Moose is sad. He misses sarcasmically.
schoolboy
ready for a fight
MooseThoughts
finally finished!